23 and me

Hey Guys,

I had last week off because I turned 23 and thought why not just take the whole week off to mourn getting old? I mean 23 may not be old but I certainly have the back pain of an older person.

A lot has happened since I turned 23, and since you guys don't know me I might as well go into a little detail. I’m old, my Mum had open heart surgery, I found out my blood pressure is too high, I’m starting to get back pain on the other side now and the Queen has died… what's next!

With all this going on, the gym has been my savior, it helps me clear my mind and focus on something else for an hour. Although I have had a bit of anxiety at the gym, especially on leg day, all I could think about was how fast my heart was beating and how easily I was running out of breath compared to before. But as I know this has only started to occur since finding out about my blood pressure, it's understandable to be focusing on this issue and the anxiety certainly does not help. I decided to take the rest of the session easy, which was the best thing to do, and make sure I take a rest day the day after.

Two days later, I head back to the gym and manage to hit a personal best on my bench press! Although it might not be much to some, I have finally been able to increase my weight to 22kg, I do feel as though I can do more but without a spot, I don’t want to end up dropping it on myself.

I focused on my workout rather than what is going on internally and I was able to use the gym as therapy again! And now I am excited to reach some new goals, but sensibly of course.

I am hoping the blood pressure is down to anxiety regarding my Mums surgery, so will be monitoring that now and then for the next few months to be on the safe side!

With all this going on, I have stopped counting my calories and been having more rest days, and my body has only changed in a good way if anything! I have been eating more calories, so I guess that's my sign to come out of a calorie deficit and move into a calorie surplus and build my muscles!

Sorry for the sadder blog this week, let's hope things are more positive next time!

Peace out and stay safe x